I am not a swimmer. My swimsuit gets wet only when I wash it mostly…after sitting on a deck chair by the pool looking like I am about to go in…Notice my hair is never wet.
This is the second time I have actually gone into a pool. Rosalie loves swimming, and every morning she is on the Island, and elsewhere too, goes swimming. She does 40 laps of the pool as her daily training. Rosalie decides to take me to the pool with her to teach me to swim.
She brings along a tiny foam bubble that I am supposed to rest my head on or hold in front of me and away I go swimming up and down the pool. Wrong!!!! I put the bubble where she tells me and my head immediately sinks and fills up my nose, mouth and ears with water. I choke and wipe the water off and look at her expectantly. I try again with the same result and re-wipe my face, clear my ears and blow my nose.
I show her how I can actually swim as long as I do not have to breathe..and kick off with my head down in a torpedo of sorts. When I try to take a breath, the same happens. I choke, swallow water, my ears and nose fill and I think I am drowning. I gasp my way upright and smile triumphantly. I am scared of water going down my nose.
She still tries. This time gives me a pair of too tight goggles, that now lock my eyes into a position where I cannot see at all, but I valiantly head off in one direction..but again when I need to take a breath, I panic and go upright and gasp and carry on.
I watch these other oldies floating along serenely on noodles. I ask the pool lady for one and she gives me one. I now can float in the water, and that is what I do. Rosalie gives up and goes off to finish her laps and I serenely float along the shallower half of the pool kicking my legs for the exercise and waving my hands in the water. I do this for an hour.
Finally her training is over and I get my now crinkled flesh out of the pool and follow her in for a cold shower. I am very happy to go home and have some hot tea and toast with scrambled eggs.
What a swim!!! I am far too old to learn as I have now perfectly mastered the art of not swimming.